2003年7月アーカイブ

日記にも書いたが、この火曜日にカウンセリングを受けた。実際にはカウンセリングと言うほど仰々しいものではなく、大学の「よろず相談室」の先生と話をしたというだけのことだ。留学や自分の心理状態などについて話をした。

I went to work an hour earlier by mistake. I spent the time at a bookstore, where I used to spend free time. I like it. I found "Science of Heart" here I mentioned on the diary of this Monday. In my hometown there isn't so big bookstores. I'm really happy to be at big bookstores.

Coming back home I found and bought a Koala no March in a very big size. Because I was very tired I wanted to eat sweets. I will eat it on work days.

最近、人の日記や雑記などを読む機会がままある。自分のこの雑記帳と比べると、読みやすいし、文章もなかなかのものが多い。それらを読んでいて感じたことが、文章の目的意識、すなわちその文章のトピックが明確であるということだ。

I lent my friend my books about studying abroad and learning English, and today she gave them back. She seemed to get interested in them. I hope those books would help her.

Well, I almost finish exams. The last one will be held on next Wednesday; Logic 1. It won't so difficult, so I can say I got released from test. But I will need to work for 6 days in coming week for trip in Kyoto in summer vacation!!

I went shopping with my brother at Akihabara. He bought his PC we chose last Sunday. I bought a digital camera for me. I'm planning to have a small trip in Kyoto in the middile of August. I want to keep my memory in pictures. Also E.S.S. is holding a camp in summer vacation. I'm really looking forward to them.

In terms of the picture on left is Bon Festival Dance ---- Japanese traditional dance in this season. I should have used a flush!!

There are many reasons for the stop of this diary in the last several months. I've been thinking of myself like below and wandering. I couldn't put down such ideas in English, because I have never used or experienced adequate expressions in Enlish in my situation. Words on dictionary were meeningless. On the other hand, I've been very busy with my part-time job and club activities. I had a few no-schedule days a month.

Anyway, keeping diary, I would like to consider myself and understand what I am. I'm sorry for stopping update.

>Now I have questions about myself. Who am I? What is the significance of my existence?

I have already spent more than a year at my current university. I think I was confident of myself before I entered this university. I have been keenly interested in computers, particularly in the Internet, since I was in the ninth grade. I believed computers were very convenient and would play an active role in business, in our daily lives and in all situations. Everyone would make use of computers. In my high school days I discussed these issues with the president of our student government and our principa, that in school life in the future, through computers connected to the internet, would dramatically change. For example, they would enable students to search through vast information stores on the web. Teachers would be able to have their own web sites to give out information they couldn't give students in classes or to exchange email with students so that relationships between them would be closer.

In addition, I was president of our E.S.S.(English-speaking society) when I was a high school junior. I liked English so much. I enjoyed talking with exchange students from New Zealand and making a speech in a speech contest as part of our club activities.

In going on to university I chose to major in Information Science, considering my interest in English to be personal. At first, assignments and papers at university were very hard for me, but I could enjoy my campus life. One day, however, I noticed I just have an aptitude for my major and I didn't have a strong passion or will for studying it. It is true that I appreciate the opportunity to make efforts for others. For instance I would be very happy if my programs help others, but I don't know what significance it has for me to actually do the programming. I want to know more about myself. I have come to have a stronger will to search deep inside of myself by studying many fields instead ofjust studying my major in my current university. ( For this purpose studying at a college in the United States is not strange to me. Ever since I was a high school student, I have hoped to study abroad, and by searching for much information about studying in America at this time, i'm glad i can finally do it.

To tell the truth, I found the name of Muskingum College in a college guide as one of the colleges which emphasizes liberal arts, and where I will be able to major in computer science in the future. In terms of my possible career plans I have no idea now. I might work for a computer related company, or have a job concerning English or become an astronomer. What I am sure of now, is that what is most important for me is to how to live my life in the present, and this will help direct me to my future.

ここ数日、実に落ち着いとる。レポートや期末テスト、もちろん留学に関しても色々とやらないかん事があるんやけど、焦りすぎることのないように、スケジュールを考えて自分をコントロールできてると思う。まぁ、提出期限を過ぎてしもうたレポートとかもあるけど、しゃーない。やっぱ一度にたくさんのことをやろうとするから自分を見失いそうになったりするんやなぁって思った。